in a shoebox...

When I take on a project, it usually turns out to be more than I planned. And cleaning my room is no exception.

Since I don't live with roommates any longer, I have to admit keeping order is not on the priority list. When my mom gently encouraged me to pick things up, she was probably hoping I'd hang up the pile of clothes on my bed and straighten out my covers. But of course, with a free day and good music, things got a little out of hand.

I not only put those clothes away; I went through my clothes and shoes to bag up the things I don't wear anymore and then proceeded to clean out the desk drawers.

Many people don't know I keep basically everything. I keep every birthday card, every encouragement note, every movie stub, every picture. Anything I deem important goes into the "memory drawers" (there are two of them).

Now, I wouldn't consider myself a hoarder, but as Nicole Krauss writes in The History of Love : "Perhaps that's why I hoarded the world: with the hope that when I died, the sum total of my things would suggest a life larger than the one I lived."

However, as I condensed the drawers into a shoebox and read through old notes (a few from elementary school) and newspaper clippings, sorted through the pictures and mix cds, I realized my life doesn't need to be portrayed as large with a whole bunch of stuff because it already is.

Though I get restless a lot and long for adventures, I could not ask for better friends, for a better family, for a better education, or for a better opportunity at living life to the fullest.

The world is at my fingertips.

And I also came to improved terms with losing people. Life moves in cycles, in seasons, and just because a friend and I are no longer close doesn't disregard the importance of our paths crossing or the impact they made in my life.

All I have to do is clean out my room for a little bit of perspective.

Currently listening to: Honey Let Me Sing You A Song by Matt Hires
Au Revoir!

xoxo
Caitlin
caitlinboyd72@gmail.com